Joanna Lumley’s Chutney Dream

Joanna Lumley loves Gurkhas. And so do I.

I love their crunchy texture, the tangy hit you get when you add them to a burger, their…oh, wait. Hang on. I’m thinking of gherkins. Sorry.

(consults Google)

Aha! Unlike gherkins, Gurkhas are ex-soldiers from the Indian Army’s Gorkha regiments. However, like gherkins they’re now linked to the delicious world of chutneys and pickles.

Yes. Pickles.

Jo-Lu, as I’ve decided she should be called, has helped develop a new variant of Sharwood’s Mango Chutney (with Kashmiri chili, if you’re really interested. Oh, you’re not? Then never mind).

Ten whole pence from each jar will be going to the Gurkha Welfare Trust, to keep them in regimental sabres, houses, postcolonial literature and anything else they need. So that’s nice.

However, Lumley goes on to proclaim that: “The Sharwood’s chefs have helped realise my dream of creating a flavoured chutney with chili from Kashmir, where I was born.”


Gosh. Wow. That was her lifelong dream, was it? Then well done her.

I like to imagine that- when little Joanna was asked by her parents what her key goals in life were- she picked up a chili and announced:

“I have a dream. For too long, mangos and chili peppers have been cruelly segregated. One day, one fine day, I would like to see a world where little mangos and little chillis can mingle in the same jar for the benefit of all humankind. But mainly gurkhas.”

But I bet she didn’t.

(This article was originally written for ace entertainment website Hecklerspray)


About Hilary Wardle
Hilary is a freelance journalist and copywriter who writes for a wide range of websites, magazines and newspapers, including Buzzfeed, MSN, The Poke, Chortle, the Guardian and the Independent. She specialises in arts and entertainment, comedy, video games and viral content. Contact her at

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: